Alice in Zombieland by Gena Showalter

Date Finished: 13 December 2013

Rating: 4*

Series: The White Rabbit Chronicles, #1

View on Goodreads.

Okay, I SO didn’t pin myself as the type of girl that would ever read those books that are basically classics that have been given a supernatural twist. You know, “Romeo and Juliet and Vampires,” “Pride and Prejudice and Zombies”… the works. Let alone any type of book about zombies.

So maybe I also thought that I didn’t like ghost books, and then I read Anna Dressed in Blood and it was amazing… so maybe my judgment is the tiniest bit flawed when it comes to gory/bloody books.

Nonetheless, Alice in Zombieland was incredible. And considering I went in totally expecting to find it disgusting and weird… it just shows how fantastic it really was.

Okay so maybe it was a little gross and weird, considering it’s about people who hunt creatures whose sole purpose in life – or non-life… whatever – is to devour your brains. But still, it was pretty excellently written for a book about the undead.

I think the number one reason I loved Alice in Zombieland was the characters. And the stuff they said. For example, I have convinced myself that I am Alice, she is me, therefore I will now forever say “craptastic” and other things Alice would say.

The amount of times I laughed out loud at Kat’s comments almost topped my laughing record at Luc from the Lux series by Jennifer L. Armentrout. And believe me, that is a large amount of laughter.

One of my favourites: “We can’t really spy on them if they’re not spying on us, now can we?”

Or even: “Girl, he wants to dip you in his Frosted Flakes and have you for breakfast. That’s his favourite cereal, by the way.”

Needless to say, I loved it. Everything was so well expressed, and her personal style of writing was so witty yet enthralling that it made me completely forget about all of my other problems, and jerk every time I was forced to exit Zombieland and re-enter the real world. I think I half-expected to find a zombie standing by my doorway every time I forced myself to put the book down to eat or sleep or something that’s unfortunately mandatory for survival.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go and devour the next book, because I’m currently dying from the suspense. It took a rather large amount of self-control to NOT go straight to Amazon.com and buy the next book, but rather to quickly type out a craptastic review and force myself to endure the torment of waiting.

“TASTE…”

Thoughts on Catching Fire

So I was lazing around wondering what I should do today when I realized that I haven’t even written a feelings blog on Catching Fire.

I didn’t even announce that I was going.

And I’ve seen it twice, now.

This is just horrific. I can’t believe it. I feel as though I’ve betrayed Suzanne Collins by going to see Catching Fire and then fangirling about it and not allowing the whole world to see how excited I was about it so that they can laugh at me because when it comes to The Hunger Games I am just that ridiculous.

I’m not even joking. I bought the special edition DVD of the first movie, and it came with a mockingjay pin and I freaked out right there in Musica about it and everybody thought I was crazy, and I’ve had the pin stuck onto my handbag ever since. It’s that bad.

But back to Catching Fire…

There are not enough words to express my feelings throughout that movie. It was just epic. I mean, I had high expectations already because the first movie was so good, but I was still shocked at just how good the acting, editing and directing was. It was just… beautiful.

They managed to stick to the book as much as possible. As a person who (almost) always reads the book before the movie, I do not tolerate directors who cut out huge chunks of the novel just to make the movie “better.”

The only problems that have arisen in The Hunger Games related to this is the fact that they cut out the mayor’s daughter and how she gave Katniss the mockingjay pin (although it was really sweet and meaningful how Prim gave it back to her etc. in the movie) and how Peeta didn’t have his leg amputated in the film, therefore he could actually swim. But that was it, I think.

Also, let me just add that whoever was in charge of casting for the two films is literally one of the most talented person on the face of this earth. Obviously the characters were not who I’d imagined them as in my head, but they were so close that it actually scared me. Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson and Liam Hemsworth were incredible. And Finnick… He was almost exactly like how I imagined him. Everybody was cast so well and I think that really helped to make the movies ten times better than they already were.

Think about it. If Kristen Stewart had been cast as Katniss, I would’ve sued. I literally would’ve sued the casting crew. I loved the Twilight books, but then the movies were… so ridiculous in comparison. They played a large part in ruining the entire series for me (the whole “team Jacob”/”team Edward” thing also made my blood sizzle… I mean seriously can you just calm down she ends up with the vampire so stop complaining the book has already been published.)

I can’t believe I just brought up Twilight in this review. Forgive me for my sins.

Oh, and I'm going to be a total teenage girl here and say that HOLY HELL KATNISS' WEDDING DRESS WAS SOOO BEAUTIFUL ASDFGHJKL CAN YOU NOT AND THE WAY IT LIT ON FIRE WAS EVEN BETTER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE CAN I PLEASE JUST HAVE THAT DRESS FOR MY WEDDING AT THE SAME TIME MARRY JOSH HUTCHERSON IN THAT WHITE SUIT GOD BLESS.

Anyway, Catching Fire was absolutely fantastic, and it just… it made me so happy. I absolutely loved it. And to those of you who have not read the books, and are currently complaining that it ends on a cliffhanger, suck it up, make yourself some tea and get ready to sit in a chair for about 4 days while you read the entire series start to finish with no breaks in between.

And to those of you who think that The Hunger Games is about teenagers with eating disorders, you are dead to me.

That also goes for the people who call the Catching Fire “The Hunger Games 2.” That’s not what it’s called. Do you call New Moon “Twilight 2”? Didn’t think so. Get your act together.

And if you haven’t seen the movie OR read the books… I just can’t be with you. I’m sorry. Go live on… Mars or something. You are a disgrace to the human race.

Recent Attempts at Socialisation

Children of the internet! The time of depression, confusion and desperation has come to an end!

Well, kind of. School’s out for the December holidays, which brings on a strange feeling of self-importance and the idea that, “We are infinite,” to quote Stephen Chbosky’s The Perks of Being a Wallflower, in teenagers all around the globe. Unfortunately, with the coming of the holidays comes the end of excuses such as: “Gee, I’m so sorry but I’m grounded until the end of exams,” or, “Whoops, sorry I can’t make that party. I’ve got a ten page History essay due Monday and my parents will kill me if I fail this one,” or even, “Sorry, I promised so-and-so that I’d help them pass Math this weekend.” *cue seven hour Call of Duty marathon and useless attempts at studying*

(Okay so maybe I’m exaggerating a little. I do actually go out, contrary to what I say on this blog, and my entire life does not only consist of reading, writing, eating and sleeping. I am just a typical internet-child, and am much, much more comfortable lying in my bed on Twitter or Tumblr than being put in awkward social situations … I have no idea why I just even tried to stand up for what remains of my dignity. Anywaaaaaayyyyy…)

Sorry for the long intro. Basically, this is another “Story-time with Amy” a.k.a “let’s listen to Amy embarrass herself publicly on the internet yet again lol #embarassingblogs #nerdfest #lame.” Ahem. Anyway.

1: The Typical High-School Party

On the Saturday after our school’s exams had finished, I decided to go to my friend’s birthday party, at which her parents voluntarily allowed her to invite about eighty people over to spend the evening sprawled out drunk in the garden. Given the amount of time I’d spent lying in my room this year, my parents actually encouraged me to go, and my other friends that were going spent an entire two weeks trying to get me excited about it, and then ruining it by warning me about all of the things that could possibly go wrong a day or so before.

So to cut a long story short, I freaked out about it – being the paranoid person I am – and then got there to realize that I am not as socially awkward as I expected, enjoyed myself – despite the large amounts of smoke that people blew into my face and the several gallons of beer that were spilled on my shoes (I’m kidding) – and then went back home to my books and YouTube and made no further attempts at moving besides:

2: Nickelback Concert

And it was amazing. There are no words to describe…

Okay, so there was the expected swearing, and the fake tequila shots that they took onstage (how stupid does Chad Kroeger think we are? I mean honestly, all professional singers know that drinking alcohol damages your voice, and there is no way you would be stupid enough to drink in the middle of a concert, and then pull it off without your voice cracking or singing off-key), but you really can’t expect any more from Nickelback.

And they genuinely put on an excellent show. We even had a moment of silence for Madiba, in which some drunken morons didn’t shut up, so the rest of the audience covered up their stupidity by singing the national anthem. It was beautiful.

My only disappointment was that Avril Lavigne did not come in as a surprise act and perform “Don’t Let Me Go” with Chad Kroeger. I think I would’ve died if that happened.

So basically, my two recent attempts at socialisation – although not as bad as I expected, and actually enjoyable – consisted of many, many, many drunk people. In conclusion, I have tried it, I did not like it, and I now have an excuse to stay holed up in my bedroom until the day I die.

(Once again, I’m joking. To those of you who do know my parents, please don’t phone them in concern about my social life. I’m fine. I do actually have friends, I do actually go out, and these two events mentioned were not the only two times I’ve been out this year. In fact, expect a blog on my clubbing experience in the near future.)

Sorry for the random update. I’ve been really out of blogging and reading lately with exams and school and everything, but now that it’s holidays hopefully I can get back into it again. I PROMISE NOT TO ABANDON MY BLOG FOR WEEKS ON END AGAIN. IT WAS A HORRENDOUS SIN. I’M SORRY.

Thanks for reading! Feel free to comment and  S U B S C R I B E  for updates whenever I post a new blog/review/poo-on-a-page-like-this-blog-I’m-sorry-again.

Allegiant by Veronica Roth

Date Finished: 30 November 2013

Series: Divergent, #3

Rating: 5*

View on Goodreads.

I had too many mixed feelings on this book, so in addition to this review, I posted a “feels” blog here.

Note: I finished this book a couple hours after I posted my Nerd List, and was too lazy to change the whole list to incorporate this book, so I’ll include it in the December Nerd list, even though I did technically finish it in November.

I honestly couldn’t think of a better way to end off the Divergent series. Allegiant was just… perfection. Of course, there were a few things that I need to discuss with the author, such as the issue of killing characters that she purposefully makes the reader fall in love with… But that can wait for another time.

The Divergent series has always managed to surprise me. The first book was amazing, and I honestly didn’t think it could get any better. I was hesitant to read Insurgent, because of the way authors usually seem to get bored during the second book of their series – with the exception of Catching Fire – but it turned out to be almost as good as Divergent, if not better. Allegiant, however, was just incredible, and had more action, betrayal, suspense and excitement than the first two books combined.

I have to admit, it takes an insane amount of talent to be able to blow the reader off their feet in the final novel in a series, and then get away with it. As much as I hated Veronica Roth while reading those final few chapters, I now hold a lot of respect for her. I hate to say it, but there was no other way that the series could’ve ended with the impact that it did (clam your panties, I’m not spoiling the plot for all those of you who have not read it yet – although you should probably go do it now).

Then again, the amount of tears I shed during the final few pages alone could’ve filled my entire house, so don’t interpret my words as an indication that I loved the ending and was happy about what happened. I most certainly was not happy, but you cannot deny that if the series had ended any other way, it would not have had the same effect as it did.

I feel as though I lost a part of myself to Allegiant, and I will never be the same again after finishing it. There’s a sort of melancholy thing about finishing a series that you love. You are never able to experience that exact feeling of sadness or surprise or excitement ever again, and it just decreases with the amount of times that you throw yourself into a world that starts off as so real, but slowly becomes an imagining.

There is no doubt in my mind that the Divergent series has put itself on the list of books my children will be forced to read for the good of humanity, along with The Hunger Games and The fault in Our Stars, and that they will enjoy it, or face the consequences.

Allegiant Feels

I feel guilty about putting all of these emotions into a review, so this is basically just a rant about Allegiant by Veronica Roth, and not an actual review, because the book deserves better than my jumbled thoughts being chucked onto a page.

Click here to read the actual review.

WARNING: If you have not read the book, reading this is not advised, because there WILL be spoilers, and you probably won’t even know what I’m talking about. There will also be a seemingly unnecessary use of death threats and upper case letters, but believe me, it’s necessary for expressing my emotion. However, if you enjoy witnessing me lose my sanity, feel free to carry on.

You have been warned.

Firstly, Veronica Roth, IT IS NOT OKAY TO JUST KILL YOUR MAIN CHARACTER EVER BECAUSE YOU’VE JUST SPENT THREE FREAKING BOOKS MAKING ME FALL IN LOVE WITH THEM AND CAUSED ME TO WASTE MOST OF MY YEAR THINKING ABOUT WHAT WILL HAPPEN IN THE NEXT BOOK AND THEN I CAN’T PUT IT DOWN BUT I WISH I HAD BECAUSE YOU JUST KILLED TRIS IN FRONT OF OUR EYES I THINK THAT COUNTS AS MURDER CAN WE PLEASE SUE AS A FANDOM I NEED MONEY TO PAY FOR MY MEDICAL BILLS AND SOME SANITY PILLS SOMEBODY PLEASE EXPLAIN WHAT WOULD POSSESS A PERSON TO DO THIS.

Ahem. So. Basically it’s not fair to put your fans through this. I literally started crying when it was Tobias’ P.O.V. and then he was all sad and he scattered her ashes while he faced his fear of heights. It was so cute. And it took them three books to finally trust each other and develop that perfect “true love” that you only really get in fairytales, and then she just had to go and die and leave him to suffer all alone.

And don’t you dare tell me that “that’s life,” because no, in fact you are wrong that is not life that is death and as a human being I am allowed to feel angry that my best friend just got inhumanely killed by the person she trusted most.

I think I might have a few problems trying to explain this story to the police. “Hi, um, yeah, I’m sorry, but I’d like to report a murder. Well, this author just inhumanely killed this girl… Yes I was a witness… No, you see, the girl wasn’t actually a real person, she was this character, but her name was Tris and I think the author should be arr - *click* … Hello?” *van for asylum shows up at my door* *spends rest of eternity locked away in a room with foam boxes stuck onto hands* *can’t read so becomes even more depressed* *dies and relates situation to Tris’ death*

Do you see the problem? This book is consuming me.

Secondly, I have encountered a problem entirely different to me dealing with the cruelty of authors in the 21^st century.

This series is making me confused.

I think it’s overtaken Hush, Hush on my list of Best YA Books/Series Ever.

I think it’s even overtaken the Lux series.

And I hate to say it, but if it hasn’t overtaken the Hunger Games yet, it’s so close that I don’t even know which one I prefer. And that scares me. Because The Hunger Games was at the top of that list ever since December 2011.

Oh, and by the way, Divergent is now a movie, and should be coming out in cinemas on 21 March 2014.

I think I’m going to explode from excitement.